Day 2 My Crush

As weird as it is for me, right now I don't really have a crush on any particular guy.  Typically there is at least one that I'm interested in, but I've been trying to take a break from guys in general, because the dating scene frustrates me, A LOT.  So instead of talking about one guy I will describe what type of guy I typically am interested in.

So as far as physical features go, I tend to go for guys that are 5'9' or taller, because I LOVE my high heels, and I'm not so much a fan of being taller than a guy I date.
Dark hair and blue eyes are my deadly combination.  Any blue eyes are attractive, but pair them with dark hair and I'm pretty much sold.
A good hair cut/style.
The guy has to have good hygiene.  I understand if he is smelly after just working out, but if he doesn't take showers, that is a deal breaker.  Also, if he wears his cologne too strong I am not likely to stick around.

And that is pretty much it on the outside.  The rest is personality.  The guy I date has to have a good sense of humor.  I grew up in a family that was very sarcastic, so I am by default very sarcastic...I joke around A LOT, and I have to be able to know that my guy will understand when I'm joking.  He also needs to be sensitive enough that he can tell when something ISN'T a joke.  Certain topics aren't joking matters, so the guy I am interested in will be able to pick up on that.  He'll have a good balance between being plan oriented and spontaneity.  I love doing random things spur of the moment, but I also enjoy a nice, well planned activity too.  He has to be able to communicate his thoughts and emotions at least 70% of the time, because I'm not a mind reader. 

Most importantly though, he has to be able to love me for who I am, with all of my flaws and imperfections.  And I have to be able to be comfortable around him.

Day 1 My Best Friend

So it is a little difficult to add to my last post about my best friend.  So I'm not going to try, for today, I'm just going to refer you to the post below "There's a point in every true friendship where friends stop being friends..."
It says everything I can presently say about my best friend Annalisa, and took me months to perfect, so it is a good one :-)

30 posts in 30 days

So I have seen several of these lists, and decided that I will participate as well.  I want to get into a habit of posting more often, and this gives me topics to work with.  So here is a modified list, combined from several.  Now you know what to look forward to (-:

Day 1 — Your Best Friend
Day 2 — Your Crush
Day 3 — Your parents
Day 4 —Your sibling (or closest relative)
Day 5 — Your dreams
Day 6 — Your most prized talent
Day 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush
Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend
Day 9 — Someone you wish you could meet
Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to
Day 11 — A Deceased person you wish you could talk to
Day 12 — Someone that makes you smile every time you think of them
Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you
Day 14 — Your favorite song
Day 15 — A character trait you would like to develop
Day 16 — A Country/State you'd love to visit
Day 17 — Someone from your childhood
Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be
Day 19 — Something about you that people make lots of comments on
Day 20 — A stranger
Day 21 — Something you don't know a lot about but would like to
Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to
Day 23 — The last person you kissed
Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory
Day 25 — Your biggest challenge right now
Day 26 — The person you know will never disappoint you
Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day
Day 28 — Someone that changed your life
Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to
Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror

There's a point in every true friendship where friends stop being friends...

...and become sisters.

There is one thing that I truly know about my best friend Annalisa.  And that one thing is that we were meant to be sisters.  She and I have been together ever since I moved to the sleepy little town of Selah, Washington.  Now...that isn't to say we've always been best friends.  I'll be honest, when I first moved to Selah I didn't really like Annalisa that much.  We were in the same ward at church, and I felt like she was ALWAYS competing to be the center of attention.  It didn't take me that long to overcome that thought though.  (Don't get me wrong, she does love being the center of attention (-; but I love that about her now, because we typically share the spotlight as two halves of a whole)

When it hurts to look back, and you're scared to look ahead, you can look beside you and your best friend will be there.

In 5th 6th and 7th grade Annalisa shared a tight knit group of friends.  We felt like we were on top of the world, because we had friends who would always stand by us, no matter what.  Those years in intermediate school were great.  So much time spent having fun.  But then like it always does, life changed.  That tight knit group of friends decided there was something wrong with me, and my world turned upside down.  I can't tell you how many days I went home and cried alone in my room over the friendships that were breaking, and how bad it broke my heart to know what those "friends" thought of me.  Through it all though, Annalisa was one of 3 people in the entire school who stood by me during the hardest time in my teenage years.  And I do mean the hardest time, because not only did most of my friends decide to desert me, but my family was also being turned upside down with my parents on the brink of divorce, and both of my sisters getting pregnant.  With all that happened in my life the year I turned 13 I was forced to become an instant adult.  Suddenly I was not the carefree teenager, I had responsibilities to my family that normal teens don't have.  Annalisa understood that, and she helped me in ways I never would have guessed could be possible.  Friends are like angels who lift us to our feet when our wings forget to fly.  Annalisa really was that angel for me.  In so many ways I had forgotten how to fly, and she helped me stand when I felt like giving up. No matter the battle, as best friends we fought it together.

"If you're alone, I'll be your shadow. If you want to cry, I'll be your shoulder. If you want a hug, I'll be your pillow. If you need to be happy, I'll be your smile... But anytime you need a friend, I'll just be me."

Eight years after my family moved to Selah, Annalisa and I were 16.  We were in High school, and starting to date...and it never ceased to amaze me the trouble we could get ourselves into.  But no matter what, we were always there for each other.  I can't remember how many times I had to chew out some boy for being dumb, or explain what dumb things meant to Annalisa so that dumb boys wouldn't take advantage of the fact that she was so sweet and innocent, and in some cases a little too trusting.  By the time we hit high school we really were inseparable...two of the three musketeers...(We really did have a third musketeer)...week days we had school and sports practices...weekends were spent at each other's houses doing homework for the classes we shared...We both learned to swing dance, and spent lots of time (the first Friday of each month) dancing with two of our best guy friends, Joey and Johnny.  During those days we forged the strongest friendships ever...that is when we truly became family.  To this day we share inside jokes and secret adventures that go back to our early days of driving and dating.  "Don't worry, we aren't *this way*, we're *this way*"  "Hey guys I wonder if they have a bathroom in here"  and Ellensburg Stake Conference.  (-:  That's right, Neno, you know what I'm talking about.

 

Everyone hears what you say...friends listen to what you say...best friends hear what you can't put into words.

After graduation I went through a rough time in my life.  I was on a self-destructive path filled with bad decision after wrong turn.  I was finding new friends, and most were bad news.  The saddest part of all was the fact that I was keeping secrets like I never had before...from my parents, from my siblings, from my best friend.  It didn't matter though, that I was hiding things from her, because little did I know, she could see it written all over my face. I still remember the night when she took my by both shoulders and said "Nichole, tell me."  I played dumb trying to act like I didn't know what she wanted me to say, but she knew, and she wanted me to tell her.  So I laid everything out there, for hours we talked and cried and talked and cried then just cried some more.  Never a judgment did she pass, instead she calmed and consoled me.  She was there to help, not condemn.  It was that night that I knew, beyond a shadow of doubt, that ours was not just a friendship.  We were bound in such a way that we would eternally be together, as sisters.



A stranger stabs you in the front; a friend stabs you in the back; a boyfriend stabs you in the heart, but best friends only poke each other with straws.

 So for some reason I think this picture and quote exemplify Annalisa.  She is the kind of person who will stick her tongue out anytime she doesn't like what you have to say...just for the shear fact that it acts as her defiance.  In  so many ways Annalisa tries to remain a child...finding the fun in everything...never wanting to grow up and get grumpy....which is why I have SO many fond memories of times when she literally would poke people with straws and do other things that most would consider absurd....but that is part of why I love Annalisa, because she can keep me having fun and living like a kid...

The only people you need in your life are the ones that prove to you they need you in theirs.

When Annalisa decided to serve a mission, it seemed to me like Satan started working overtime.  So many things happened that made it hard for her to get her papers submitted.  And even after she got her mission call things came up that nearly kept her from going.  Anything and everything under the sun happened, from boy drama to family drama, all of it was very discouraging for her.  In all the time that we have been friends, I think this was the only time that I was able to be 1/2 as good of a friend to her as she has been to me.  She needed me, and I was so happy to be able to be there for her.  She was always there for me, and she inspired me, so to be able to return the favor to some small fraction of a degree made me so happy.  In the end she got to Brazil on time, and everything has been working itself out ever since.

The words that escape a friend's mouth are "I'll be there when you say you need me" but the words that are unheard from a true friend's heart are "I'll be there... whether you say you need me or not."

I am ashamed to say that I am a TERRIBLE letter writer.  I have the hardest time consistently writing to my friends who are on missions.  It is a problem I have always had.  One that I deeply dislike.  So when Annalisa left for her mission I made a promise to her, and to myself that I would write to her EVERY week.  And at first I kept to that promise.  Then like it always does, life changes.  I became 100% committed to a relationship, and I wrote to Annalisa all about it.  Telling her all the wonderful things that I loved about it.  She wrote back so excited for me, and wanted even more information about the relationship.  When the relationship ended I was devastated, and with each letter she kept asking about it, I couldn't bring myself to tell her it was over.  So I stopped writing.  It killed me.  I hated that she was out there in Brazil and I wasn't willing to talk to her when I had the chance.  Several months went by like this.  No contact at all.  Then out of nowhere while I was checking my email I noticed a short little note from her.  All it said was "Hey! I wrote you back! did you get my letters!!! write me back! I miss you! love you!!"  And I broke down, telling her everything in a letter....a real letter.  I pulled out all the stops, and didn't hold anything back.  The next thing I know I had another email from her.  In it she told me "I want to you to know that Ive been thinking about you a lot these last couple of months and praying for you too. I knew there was something wrong. Call it intuition, or just the love of a best friend and sister but i knew. Oh Nichole, how i wish i could be there with you right now to give you a hug and tell you it will all be alright. When i got your letter, i cried because i could feel your pain through the letter and i just want you to be happy."  She told me how she had the feeling I needed her help.  But I hadn't written to her so there was no way for her to know why.  That email turned me around, and I told her that.  Between telling her everything that happened and her responding in her ever loving way I felt as if a HUGE weight was lifted, and I could breathe again.  And because of that, I haven't quit writing her again.  She comes home in less than 200 days, and yes...I'm counting EVERY ONE of them. :-)

There is one friend in the life of each of us who seems not a separate person, however dear and beloved, but an expansion, an interpretation, of one's self, the very meaning of one's soul. ~Edith Wharton

For all that has happened, every minute detail of my life, Annalisa has been with me.  On this roller coaster of life she has been right beside me at the deepest depressions and the happiest of highs.  For that I am eternally grateful.  I know that we will stay together as friends for the rest of our lives, and we have even more roller coaster to get through.

To my best friend:
I will stay up all night talking to you so you never feel alone (you’ll have to deal with me in the morning though)
I’ll make sure your crush stays liking you over ANYONE (physical violence may be required)
I will cancel plans in a second for you (even if it’s a date with Zac Efron!)
I would rather hold you while you’re cry, than be partying with anyone (YES ANYONE)
If someone breaks your heart, I’ll break their face (with pleasure)
I’ll make sure you KNOW you ARE the best thing in the world (once you become conceited this deal is off!)
I’ll work my butt off to get you what you wanted for Christmas (This does not include Edward Cullen)
I’d buy the whole world to make you smile (Because everyone wants a globe)
I’ll go on talking like an idiot till you laugh (or punch me out… whichever one makes you happy)
I would throw myself in front of a bullet/truck/crazy manic to make sure you were okay (I expect you to be at my hospital bed EVERY SECOND)
I will never pick another living soul over you in my life (but dead souls are a different story…)
If you ever need someone to pick you up I AM THERE, if I can’t pick you up, I’ll lay there with you... (I’d prefer to lay its easier)
I will promise to never leave till you want me too, and my arms will still be waiting for you when you want me back (but then again who would ever want ME to leave!)
I promise all this because I know I will never find another person like you, SO WHY TRY!